Community Giving · Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Family · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · New Year · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Celebrating YOU on your Birthday

I love Birthdays. I’ve said this before on this blog and I will say it again.

Your birthday is like a personal New Year.

It’s an opportunity to reflect on the year that has passed and to look forward to things you want to accomplish. I spoke about this idea 2 years ago in my blog titled, The Importance of Birthdays, where I talk about why I feel we need to take the day (or week or month) and celebrate YOUR life. At that point in my life, I was about to turn 29 and reflected on how far I’ve taken this website and where I want to go. This time around, I’m taking a look back at all of the amazing things year 30 brought me (new home, new job, amazing times with family a friends, a new niece, Godmother-hood and so much more), and thinking about my hopes and dreams for what 31 has in store.

31…

I’m going to be married with a few kids and be well into my career…

LOL… how many of us thought that?! When I was 15, the thought of being in my 30’s meant I was OLD and obviously living life as a mom with a million and one kids. I would say that my generation however, is the first to show that this isn’t the norm anymore. Yes, many of my family and friends began a family in their 20’s, {which is great}, but it’s socially acceptable to not start a family now until you are in your 30’s, where before it was looked down upon. While age is “only a number,” history has taught us that certain things need to happen in certain years, and that idea has faded quite a bit. For me, I’m enjoying every single year and appreciating the things I’m learning, the paths life has put me on, the people I’ve met and the difference I’m making in the lives of those around me.

Since today is my birthday, I’m feeling extra reflective about where the last year has taken me, but am even more excited to see what the year ahead has in store. The one thing that I know I’m looking for to is the constant and ever changing project of bettering myself.

What good is a New Year if you don’t have resolutions, right?

In year 31, I’m going to be more forgiving of others and project more positivity and warmth to those around me than I ever have before. I want to work on the inside so it reflects even brighter on the outside.

What are your feelings on birthdays? Do you like celebrating them? Do you need to show yourself a little more love on your birthday? If my vote counts, I say you go all in and celebrate that amazing life of yours! Whether your 15, 18, 25, 37, 52, 60, 71 or 100, every new year offers us the opportunity to do things we want, say what needs to be said, travel, change, date, get married, start a hobby…

W H A T E V E R   W E   W A N T

Use your birthday as the launching pad to the life you want to live.. even if it’s for this year only!

Happy birthday to you, and happy birthday to me!

Cheers,

-Aurora

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Children · Community Giving · Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Family · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

If You Can’t Be Kind, Be Quiet.

Being rude is easy. It does not take any effort and is a sign of weakness and insecurity. Kindness shows great self-discipline and strong self-esteem. Being kind is not always easy when dealing with rude people. Kindness is a sign of a person who has done a lot of personal work and has come to a great self-understanding and wisdom. Choose to be kind over being right and you’ll be right every time because kindness is a sign of STRENGTH.

This week I came across a few instances and reminders of how important it is to be KIND. Most importantly, I was reminded how important it is to be kind, even when someone isn’t being kind to you or has done something hurtful or rude to you. YIKES is that a hard one or what? You know me, and my likelihood of being a positivity promoter, but how can you do that when someone is rude or mean to you?

It isn’t easy!

There is someone in my life, whom I care a lot about, that sometimes falls in the category I mentioned above. Every once in awhile, they cross that line of no return: they say something that is mean, rude or insensitive, and it leaves me wondering:

what the heck did I do do deserve that?

So when I tell you that I KNOW being kind to a rude person is not easy, I mean it. How can you turn the cheek when it’s someone close to you and also, how do you turn the cheek when it’s someone NOT close to you (maybe a boss, co-worker, person on the street, acquaintance, social media troll etc). I’ll touch on both of these topics:

  1. Someone close to you. I just paused and sighed as I wrote that. This is probably the worst. I am a firm believer in that if you allow someone to continuously treat you a certain way {good or bad}, that they will continue to do so, because it’s a learned, established behavior. In my adult life, I’ve never had a problem with confrontation, nor do I view tough conversations as negative, because I believe they’re important to reach a positive outcome. I expect, that if we’re having a mature conversation, that two adults should be able to come to a resolution, even if not right away, {or if there’s some screaming and yelling}, because they both should have the same desired outcome- a resolution. If the other person isn’t on this same page, or isn’t open to mature discussion (right away or ever), the Road Less Traveled here, is Kindness. I think this is most applicable with people who might not be being anywhere (family, bosses, co-workers etc). People do not have to be on the same page as you for you to be kind to them. By being kind, you’re respecting that they aren’t where you’re at and whatever position it is that they have in your life. My advice, you remain calm and kind to these people. Be the example of how they should act, and remember, being kind always puts you in right.

2. Someone NOT close to you. These people ALWAYS get 1 of 2 things from me: a quick witted (but KIND, sometimes sarcastic) response OR a smile and no response at all.

Because sometimes, being KIND also means keeping your mouth shut.

Especially when you know it won’t help make the situation better. In my career, it’s not uncommon for me to have hard conversations with employees, and every once in awhile, a rude, unnecessary comment gets directed toward me. Sometimes it’s public, sometimes it’s behind closed doors, but it does happen. I would say 99.9% of the time, it has nothing to do with me, and more about the issue at hand, so I always try to remember that. This might be an occasion where I smile and not say much, or I respond kindly and try to understand their view. This is also where I practice keeping my mouth shut. Is there someone in your workplace bothering you? Can you try harder to keep a smile, and focus on yourself? It’s not easy people, but I’m telling you- It’s Worth IT!

I think another place we see this is in our own communities and day-to-day interactions with strangers. It is SO important to remember Kindness, even when we are in a rush or having a bad day. Why? Because of the ripple-effect not being kind can have. Imagine the impact you can make in someones day by going out of your way to be Kind, rather than the opposite effect of what being rude, mean or frustrated can create.

I’m going to leave you with inspiration I’ve gained over the last week. I began following Real Talk Kim on Twitter and think she is one of the realest, most genuine people on there! She’s all about keeping it real, while also promoting positivity, faith and being Kind. I also listen weekly to the Podcast of my favorite Bachelorette, Kaitlyn Bristowe  and her guests this week, Lauren Paul and Molly Thompson, are the creators of the Kind Campaign. This campaign focuses on girl on girl bullying, and it’s lasting effects, while also taking a preventative measure, focusing on forgiveness and KINDness. It’s truly remarkable, and I encourage you to check it out. I’m passing along the inspiration I received from them, so help keep the chain going!

What a difference we could all make if we chose to treat one another with Kindness, even, and especially when, it isn’t easy.

And remember…

Now go spread some Kindess!

Cheers,

-Aurora

Community Giving · Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Family · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · New Year · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Casting Your Insecurities On Someone Else

I could really take this post so many routes, but I’ll stick with the title: Casting Your Insecurities On Someone Else. What does this quote me?

Blowing out someone else’s candle won’t make yours shine any brighter.

I’ve seen this thought so many times and always look to it as one of my favorites. How many times have we, or someone we know, put down something about others because it’s meant to downplay an insecurity that we or another have.

I’ve had a lot of examples in my own life lately that bring me back to this quote. I’ve seen people I’m close with put down a thought or an action of someone we know, because (in reality) it’s making them feel better about a shortcoming or insecurity that they have about themselves.

I guess when I think about this, my conclusion is, before we tear someone down or judge them, take a second to think inward. Nine times out of 10, critiques and negativity toward others stem from our own insecurities and things we want to change (or don’t like) about ourselves.

Can’t you think about a time where you blew out someone’s candle to make yours shine brighter? I bet you can.

To blowing out less candles,

-Aurora

Community Giving · Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Housekeeping · Motivation · Networking · New Year · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Why you can Begin, Again

I’ve thought about these 2 words, almost obsessively, for the last month and a half. Begin Again. Aurora, you can BEGIN.AGAIN. 

It’s funny, a new year starts and all of a sudden you’re given this feeling that everything can start fresh. 11:59 changing to 12:00 on January 1st sparks something that gives you the feeling that you can do anything this upcoming year. For all of the social media posts that I see stating things like “New Year, New Me,” Or “This Year is My Year,” I also see the ones telling us that we don’t need a new year to start something new. That we don’t need a new year to wipe the slate clean, start over, get a new job, leave that lousy relationship, lose the weight, begin the hobby etc. I always fell in the category of the first group of people, because the new year, to me, felt like an auto-delete of anything you’ve been unhappy with, and provides the (whether you like it or not) birth of something new.  It’s a fresh start.

This new year was different for me though- I didn’t make many changes I was hoping to, to jump start 2018. I began the year sick, had a sudden loss of someone close to my family and found that after all of this died down, I wanted to rest. Rather than propel myself into my “New Year New Me” attitude, I wanted to take a breather.

And the above, really got me thinking.

What are the things I want to change this year? Why do I want to change them and what’s the motivation to do so? Why did I have to start January 1st, and why can’t I start anytime? While the excitement of a new year has always been something to motivate me, the reasons WHY I want to make these changes should be enough to motivate me to get going. To begin, again.

So starting with the publishing of this post, I’m giving myself permission to BEGIN again. It’s not 1/1/18, nor did the clock turning to midnight last night mean anything spectacular… it just meant it’s my day to be ready to press play. What am I pressing play on?

  1. Lent begins tomorrow. That means, for Catholics, preparing for the death and resurrection of Jesus. AKA I’m gonna continue attending church weekly and being more mindful of prayer and the big G!
  2. I need to get my work out on!  I know when I’m stressed or feeling low, that a good work out can boost my energy and help me feel more productive throughout the day. This means, 3+ more gym visits a week and minding my diet. I also think this will include runs with my pup… because she loves that!
  3. Reading my mountain of books at home before buying more. I’ve been averaging 1 every 2 weeks, so, so far so good.
  4. Reestablishing connections with the family and friends in my life that I haven’t spoken with as much as I’d like to. Sometimes you have to be the one to initiate, and it’s better to help build than to wait. My brother is doing this one too, so having that reminder helps too!
  5. Get more sleep. There is no explanation needed here.
  6. Lastly, I’m going to put my positivity and inspirational attitude to the test. I’ve always been proud of the way I carry myself and engage others with my warmth and excitedness for life. Some things in my life have gotten me to feeling a little unlike myself, so I’m going to work harder to put my best attributes forward.

Is there anything you need to Begin Again?

I encourage you and pray that you do it… because you owe it to yourself to!

To beginning again, cheers.

-Aurora

Counseling · Entrepreneur · Faith · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Of All The Things That Happened, What Didn’t?

C7C2C468-050D-4046-B613-FDA41CB94E98Sometimes you need to thank God for what didn’t happen. Thank Him for the things He’s stopped that you knew nothing about.

How deep is this? Trust me, I know. But it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, especially as we head into the time of year thinking about things we are thankful for, spending time with loved ones, exchanging gifts etc. We all have the scenarios in our lives that we wish played out differently. Maybe it’s a lost relationship, a negative situation or argument or even that one job you wanted to get that never worked out. God’s plan is so much bigger than ours that we can’t begin to fathom it’s greatness and complexity.

And let’s talk about gratitude- It’s so much easier to be thankful for something when you wanted it and now appreciate having it. How about the things we never had to endure or go through because God stopped them from happening? There are very few times in our life where we can see something almost happened and didn’t (and we become grateful), but what about the things we can’t see? I’ll tell you what- these thoughts alone are enough to make me grateful.

To know that God has had my back my whole life and continues to do so, regardless of my continued praise and appreciation that I may forget to show sometimes. How amazing it is to have the ultimate spiritual, mental, emotional and physical bodyguard, even if you forget to say thanks every once in awhile.

Thank you for all the things that didn’t happen.

-Aurora

Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Smiling at Strangers

Let’s talk impact of small gestures:

Smile at strangers. We’re in this together.

Is there any smaller act that can go further? As someone who is always told “You’re always smiling,” I can tell you, it really does have an effect on people. Of course, being a Human Resources professional, I always like to display a positive demeanor and smiling is the easiest way to do that. I also think I’m a happy person for the most part, so it does come naturally.

How about you? Are you someone who looks down at their phone as they walk? Or not make eye contact with the person who held the door for you? Or that you held the door for? These are the moments where human connection is often missed, but could be the most effective. But listen- I get it. Do you need to walk around with a big cheesy grin on your face all day? No. Are you someone who struggles with RBF (I’ll say Resting Bored Face… but I’m sure you know what I mean). RBF is a REAL thing… some of the nicest people I know look like they’re not nice at all when they are resting their face or unaware that people are looking at them. Haha- so it may not come as natural for all of us, but if the intention and the presence in the moment is there- why not smile at a couple of strangers?

It’s a little thing that can go a looooooooooooooong way. Will you do something for me? After reading this, and you go back into your day and life, take some time to smile at people. You interact with more people than you know and without saying a single word, you say so much with a smile.

Without saying a single word, you say so much with a smile.

To being in this together,

-Aurora

Counseling · Dreams · Faith · Friendship · Motivation · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

Eliminating The Negative In Your Life

Let go of everything that negatively effects your life. The people, the places, ALL of it.

I have talked about this topic before… because you all know how much I love to preach the positive lifestyle, but I let some negativity in recently, and I have to tell you, the reminder to STOP and take a step back helped me so much. So much so, that I wondered how often it is that we find ourselves going down the rabbit hole and before we know it, we’re body deep, and are struggling to regain our footing.

So what happened? We all have those few people in our lives that bring us anxiety or stress, OR they serve as triggers to specific instances in our lives that brought stress, anxiety, negativity, pain, etc etc etc. When I was in the presence of one of these people recently, they did the same thing they always dothey minimized and put down something positive and exciting that I shared, to justify their opposite, negative view. UGH.

So I went down the rabbit hole…

I spent the next hour thinking: WHAT A JERK!!!!!!!!!! SOME PEOPLE NEVER CHANGE!! (Of course this was inside my head– I’ve learned to keep thoughts like that to myself, esp. in an initial response).

I let my mind wonder, doubted myself and allowed for this persons comments to make me think negatively toward myself. “Do they have a point? Why do I think this is so great? Do other people think this way?” Self doubt, self doubt, self doubt. Exactly. What. They. Wanted. See, here is the thing: I know this person typically has a glass half empty attitude, and puts others down when feeling envious, or even, jealous. So part of me is correct… this person hasn’t changed. What CAN CHANGE however, is the way I let it affect me… the way I let it go. So, after this hour passed, I literally said to myself:

This has nothing to do with you. Any negative comments or energy from that person is THEIRS- there is no need for me to take it on as mine.

So here I am… some time after this happened, and while I’m proud I was able to talk myself through it, I thought it was important to share. Negative people, places and instances are all around us. Our biggest, strongest weapon against negativity in our lives is our own ability to look it in the face and see it for what it is. And when you can do that, and you no longer feed it, you can let it go. All of it.

It’s certainly a work in progress, but I’m committed to letting go of and eliminating as much negative from my day to day as possible. When you let the negative in, you decrease the room for light, happiness, growth and my favorite (you already know), positivity.

What negativity are you trying to let go of in your life? Are they people, places, both? I’d love to hear your thoughts.

To kicking it Positive,

Aurora

Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes · Uncategorized

How to Start… Now.

“Whether you think you’re ready or not, start right now. There is magic in action.”

Ahhhh, this. What I love about this thought is that it’s applicable to almost any goal, dream or action you want to take in your life. If you want to re-enroll in school, start working out, get back on the dating scene, try that new hobby… there is always tomorrow,  but why not start RIGHT NOW… if because you can!

I’m going to get a little more personal here, because that’s what this blog has always been about- being open and honest about my own feelings and sharing what I think will be helpful for others who may be thinking or experiencing similar situations in their own life. In order to explain fully, we need to take a quick step back to tie this all together.

Over the last year and a half, I’ve been enjoying everything that being a newly wed has to offer, from moving in together (no, we did not live together beforehand… no crazy reason why, we just thought it would be fun to wait to move in- feel free to ask more about this if interested), spending a lot of quality time together, to adopting our beautiful rescue, Luna, and lastly, buying a new home!  It’s been a fun (at times, crazy/difficult/stressful) year, but it has been nothing short of incredible when spending it with my person- my husband, Joe. And while we’ve learned a lot over the last year and have had some amazing times, in our discussions lately, we realized something was missing (no, not a baby (yet), slow down). In the midst of binge-watching our favorite shows, going out to eat all the time and enjoying life to the fullest, we began letting our fitness and health take a back seat.

Who is Maxx Fitness and why is he hitting my bank account each month?

Image result for gym meme

Friends in a relationship, let me tell you- when your partner (or even a good friend) JOIN YOU in your fitness journey, life is SO MUCH EASIER than if you did it alone. As an extroverted person, I am motivated by others and the environment around me, so going to the gym, and with a partner, are key to me sticking with any program or routine I want to start. Beginning this week, my husband and I have began eating a little bit better and headed back to the gym (What’s up, Maxx!) This is exciting to me, because I obviously want to feel healthy for myself, but I also want to feel good and take all the positivity that a healthy lifestyle can bring, into my marriage. If you’re not in a relationship or don’t have have a close friend to join you on your journey, YOU HAVE ONE in me! Send me a message and I’d be happy to chat and share motivation with you!

So this is my journey on “Starting Now” and putting action into something I want. What’s your journey leading you toward? Here are 5 Steps I’ve created on how to start anything you want in your life, NOW.


Listen, my own worst enemy and the voice that talks me out of things I want to do is my own mind and negative self talk. Have you tried before and failed? Do you lack self-confidence? Has someone told you you’re unable to reach your goal? SO WHAT. This is not the first time I’ve run down this list of ways… and I’m positive I will have to run through it numerous times until I feel that I’ve made it to where I want to go.

So take it from someone who is beginning now… you can too. Whatever your goal is, whatever you want in life, the only one truly holding you back, is you. What is it in your life that you can start now? I’d love to know!

To starting NOW….♥

With love and sparkle, Aurora

Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Friendship · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Tribes

The Reel is not Real

The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel 

I’m going to start this post with a hashtag that I’ve created: #TheReelisNotReal 

How many of us become insecure because of something we see on the internet? Ladies, have you ever looked at another woman’s post and thought: “I wish I looked like that.” Have you ever seen someone’s relationship posts and thought: “I wish I was that happy in my relationship.” To the gents out there, ever see abs you wish you had or the perfect woman with the perfect guy and wish that was you? Ever see someone with the perfect job you wish you had? Welcome to Instagram and most of social media my friends. 

BUT LISTEN UP:::::::: 

The Highlight Reel of peoples lives that you see online is not their life, I would gamble, 90% of the time! The loving relationship, perfectly fit body, amazing career, perfect hair… these are all things we want, but comparing your whole life situation to one persons post, is causing more issues and insecurity because you believe that what you’re seeing is someone’s 100% life. It ISN’T

I do believe that majority of people who post their Highlight Reel aren’t trying to make anyone feel bad, insecure or less than them- they’re posting the things that make them feel good, proud, pretty, lucky etc. We all do that! BUT this is about our responses to the Reel. You can’t be critical of yourself over perfection you see on the internet. The perfection that most likely took:

  •  25 takes
  • The perfect lighting
  • Face Tune
  • Do-overs
  • Photoshop
  • etc etc etc etc etc

It is proven that depression rates have gone up in our country among children and adults because of what they compare themselves to online posts. It’s. So. Sad. But it’s also a reality. So how do you stop this? How do you feel more secure with yourself and not compare yourself to ideals you see online? I haven’t mastered this yet, but I tell myself that anyone or anything I admire on the internet, 9 times out of 10, has their own issues, too. The seemingly perfect couples gets into drag out fights, the girl with a perfect body took a half hour picking a filter and whitening her teeth with FaceTune (although I do love that app), the person who lost 100lbs (GO THEM), feels like they haven’t lost enough… it’s in all of us!  And what better way to help dig yourself out of your thoughts than to realize you’re not alone? ♡

The internet is a tricky place. Especially social media. How do you fall in line with posting positive things & not airing your dirty laundry? The truth to that, I think, is being an authentic post-er. I thought about this after following an amazing initiative #Realstagram through Raw Beauty Talks and how they’re empowering instagrammers and social media gurus to be themselves online, while still posting or promoting what they are all about or trying to sell. How…? By posting a makeup-free selfie or writing the truth behind the perfect picture you just posted (*not seen: my dog bitting a hole through my favorite shoe as I capture my perfectly puckered kissy face*).  I love this. 

In closing, friends- try and be nice to yourself. And while you’re at it- remember that the entire internet who posts away each day feels the exact same way you do– just a tad bit insecure. But just as they share that with you, remember their posts are mainly their Highlight Reel and not their Behind The Scenes. We all have that, too. ♡

To appreciating the genuine you ★ ☆ ✰

-Aurora 

Community Giving · Counseling · Dreams · Entrepreneur · Faith · Goal Digger · Goals · Motivation · Networking · Paying It Forward · Self Realization · Uncategorized

Why You Should Give Back- The Power of Small Acts

Tonight is the eve of our annual Give Back Lehigh Valley Softball Tournament and I am SO EXCITED… and a little antsy! My (now) husband and I created this event back when we were dating… we got engaged there and now are married. It’s been 4 years and I can’t believe how quickly the time to passed and how this event has evolved. 

What does not amaze me, is how awesome it feels to have created such an amazing give-back event that continues to get bigger and bigger as the years go by!!! GIVING BACK IS EASY… and it doesn’t have to be something big or something that grows… it can be small acts that make a difference in the life of another.  

We began our Give Back Event to help me fundraise for our local Cystic Fibrosis chapter a few years back when I was named a Lehigh Valley Finest Under 40 honoree. That was with 4 teams, a few donations and some cool T-shirts. The event tomorrow is anticipated to have anywhere from 150-200 people and over 100 participants. 😳 IT’S amazing!… but truly, it also takes a village. 

Each year, I use the all social media outlets to plug the event, solicit sponsorship and to shed the light on how YOU can give back and together, all of our small efforts make a BIG impact. For example, this year alone, strangers have reached out to me to become a part of this and volunteer; friends from grade school that I haven’t spoken to personally or seen in years have donated product for the event; and some incredible Lehigh Valley businesses stepped up to be big name sponsors of the event. I know this has built over the years, but it doesn’t change the pure awe that I feel when I see so many people coming together. I can tell you, that as our 4th Annual event, we became completely sponsored by businesses and individuals who want to give back, right here where we live. Years ago- a lot of what made the event came out of our own pockets… which was something we were prepared for, but appreciate now that it’s changed. It’s a beautiful thing to see so many wanting to drive change and to be a positive force in the community. 

So here we are, a few hours out from the big day beginning, and I’m so excited I can’t sleep. This event is our little piece of what we’re able to put out into the world, and it feels amazing. If this day inspires a few people to give a little more than they do, then we’ve done our job. At the very least, we can provide some assistance for our local charities and organizations, and provide a positive, fun day for the community. In our last 3 tournaments we’ve raised $25,000 and hope to add another 10k to that number tomorrow for Nam Knights of the LV and Logan’s Heroes Animal Recue! 🐾🇺🇸⚾️

If you want to see more about our event, please visit GiveBackSoftball.com & please comment below if you need any inspo or help creating a Give Back event!

To helping those in your community… ❤️

-Aurora