Counseling · Expectations · Journaling · Living with Intention · Relationships · Self Realization · Uncategorized

Balancing Other People’s Expectations

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Talk about a visual!

Lately I’ve been realizing how much of my own happiness/disappointments within myself are based around pleasing others or living up to their expectations of me. I find myself feeling stressed over what someone might think, how they took this or that, whether or not they think that is good enough, etc etc etc.

Sounds exhausting, right?

This is where my “SO WHAT” mantra comes in. So what if you’re not living up to others expectations of you, does that matter? Are their expectations realistic and do they match what’s important to you?

What actually matters is whether or not you are (or are becoming) the version of yourself that you went to be!! It only matters if you are living up to your own expectations. And guess what? If you’re not, you have the power, every-single-day, to change that. Remember that what others expect of us isn’t always about us- it’s can be about a fear, or an insecurity of theirs that they’re projecting on you or needing from you. Others expectations often have nothing to do with us specifically. And just how others do it to us, it’s important to remember that sometimes we can be doing that to others as well. It’s not easy to be mindful of, but if you are, you’re ahead of the curve!

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On the flip side, what’s even crazier to think, is that majority of the time, the expectations we think others have about us, don’t even exist! We are subconsciously making things “heavier” than they need to be! Somewhere along the line in our relationship other people, we may have developed a feeling of what they expect from us as friends, siblings, co-workers, partners, colleagues, acquaintances, etc etc etc. Most of the time, however, you’ll find, the things people love and value in you are a lot less complicated than what you think you have to live up to.

Again for those who need to read this again:

…the things people love and value in you are a lot less complicated than what you think you have to live up to.

Being honest, I read that for myself again, too.

To overthinking a little less, letting go of the heavy feelings, giving ourselves more grace and sharing that grace with others too…

Cheers,

-Aurora

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Goals · Motivation · Self Realization

Move. You’re Not A Tree.

You Are Not A Tree

” If you don’t like where you are, move. You’re not a tree.”

What a quick reminder of reality. Sometimes we think we’re stuck in a situation or worry about circumstances, and don’t realize that they are just that- situations and circumstances. Too often, I think we forgot that have have power over both of these things in all aspects of our lives. This sits most recently with me, as I’ve come to the realization that things I am currently unhappy with, can change… and that I have the power to make that happen, when I want. That’s the key to getting what you want, deserve, are looking for… you make it happen by flipping the switch.

Do you want to lose weight/create healthier habits? Are you in a relationship that you feel you shouldn’t be? At a job where you know you need to try something new? Or maybe you’re looking to start a relationship, get on the dating scene, or take up a new hobby- YOU have the power to jump-start all of these things and to make them happen for yourself-NOW.

That’s what this means… YOU, ARE NOT, A TREE. The only thing rooting you down is yourself. The things you want to change, can change, you just have to hit the start button.

From one former tree to another,

Aurora Beani